Lovesickness
by Northernryu
Summary: OkitaxOC. ONESHOT split in 2 parts. Okita get injured and is sent off to the hospital. There he falls in love with a nurse who always seems to be flustering, a bit clumsy, gets angry easily, gullible and very teasable, which Okita can't help but think cute everything about her. But with his sadistic personality, wonders if he can ever get through his feelings to her.
1. ONESHOT Part 01

Lovesickness, part 01  
(slightly long oneshot)

* * *

Such a failure on the Shinsengumi First Division Captain, Okita Sougo, to be sent to the hospital with serious injuries.

_...and such a failure to be falling for a mere nurse too! *anger*_

Tsk! Why the bloody hell did it end up this way?  
I had never thought that I would ever fall in love with someone...  
...and this is the outcome?

Bull sh*t!

Ahh, but then here I am, in love with a woman.  
And what's more, it didn't take me long to accept that fact... (though I will SEPPUKU myself if I EVER let that slip off my tongue without an excuse!)

And then, there are things I've come to realize, because of that feeling.  
I had found out that "love" isn't something you decide upon.  
It relates to neither logic nor morality.

_Only just the rapid thumping of your heart and the body that decides to pilot the body on its bloody own!_*anger* (once again!)

How scary this "sickness" is...*sigh*

So the super fast healing body decides to move on its own with a crutch in one hand, escaping the room. Again.  
And where my legs lead me, is to the sofa that aligns with the reception of the nurse station, where I see her flustering about the most.

I lower myself onto the sofa and sighing at my incompetence self.  
Then as if the sofa had a nurse bell, as soon as I set my ass on it, the one I hear my name being called from across the corridor.

"Ah-! Okita-kun! You're straying about again! How many times have I told you to. stay. put. in. bed!"

The nurse, who comes stomping towards my way with a frown, is the one who makes my pulse rate rise high.  
Seriously... she fails as a nurse at that.

* * *

"_Kotobuki-san!_ Address him as 'Okita-_san_'"

"S-Sorry..."I immediately apologise, but this is all because Okita-k... Okita-san had told me not to call him that way...

"Hey, Miss Nurse. I think I'm getting slightly dizzy, so can you assist me back to my room?"

The sly boy smirks as he stares up at me from the sofa.

"If you were able to come all the way here, you should be able to get back on your own! Please go back on your own!"

"Kotobuki-san! It has only been a week after his operation! How rude of you to talk in that manner to a patient like that! Be sure to assist him properly to his room without excuse!"

Immediately after my rant at this troublesome patient, I am scolded by the head nurse _again_.

I once again apologise deeply before glaring towards the source of problem who returns me an evil smirk.

"Are you allowed to glare at a patient like that? You're gonna get scolded by the head nurse again, Miss Nurse."

He's definitely making fun of me. _Playing _with me.

_Even though he's younger than me!_

But then there's me, who just forgives him in the end.  
Because this prank-loving Okita-kun just seems too cute to be unforgiving...

I let out a small sigh before helping Okita-kun stand up and snake my hands around his waist to support him to his private room.

I am easily able to support Okita-kun's body, which should be much heavier and harder to support.

I can feel that Okita-kun tries hard not to put his weight upon me.  
If he had truly needed support, there would be no way that a weak person like me would be able to even hold him up!

Then why he is making me do this... is definitely because he's trying to bother me and my work!

...but though I complain, my inner self is actually filled with overjoy.  
To be able to be in physical contact with Okita-kun is such a happy thought, that I am worried if I am doing a good job at hiding this feeling.

"Hey"

"Yes?"

When Okita-kun lies down on his bed, I pull over the blankets over him, and that's when he starts speaking to me again.

"What's your name?"

_Is he trying to bother me again?_

"Doesn't it say right here? It is read . ," I say clearly as I point my finger at my name tag.

To that, Okita-kun pouts as he feels that he's been treated dumb and can't read kanji.  
But that expression is just so cute...

_This kind of cute aura that he emits, definitely tells me that he has an elder sister!_

When I think of something, I quickly take action, so... I ask Okita-kun before I know it.

"Um, you don't happen to have an elder sister, do you, Okita-kun?"

"Huh? Ah... yeah, I did."

For a second, he gives me a blank stare for the abrupt question out of the blue, but then replies.  
But that reply...

_...past tense?_

"She passed away last year..."

As if he had read my mind, he replies with a sad smile, and it makes me realise that he had truly loved his sister.

"Oh, sorry..."

My heart throbs.

"Doesn't matter. Anyways, your name."

"Huh? Um... Kotobuki..."

"Name"

"Like I _said_, Kotob-"

"Name"

"Koto-"

"Name"

I nearly groan at Okita-kun's annoyance, and was going to complain, but when I stare at him, I see his crimson eyes staring right back at me with such seriousness that I come to realise that he's not trying to annoy me.

_but the his motive... is it...?_

"...Ritsuna."

I try out saying my given name.  
And to that, again he emits that "little brother" aura while he enlarges his eyes with surprise.

"Heh~, what a cute name you have."

His smirk comes back on and a reply that makes me heart jolt.

_Ah~! Don't say things like that! You're gonna make me blush, you moron!_

" R-really...? I think it's a fairly normal name..."

Ah, yes. My face is fully blushing isn't it?  
Okita-kun looks at my face and starts chuckling.

"Ri. tsu. na. Okay, you're 'Ricchan' then."

I become surprised at the sudden nickname I'm given, and Okita-kun starts laughing at me again for that.

And like this... I am always washed away by him and his wildness.  
Even though it's still only one week since the first day we've met...

*sigh*

* * *

The first time when Okita-kun had been carried in to the hospital, he had been unconscious.  
Apparently he had protected a fellow mate from a bomb and had been thrown onto a nearby building, breaking a leg, puncturing his guts, and major bruises here and there.

_To have such an injury when he's only just 19..._

I had felt relieved to know that he hadn't been thrown head first onto the building...  
That's what I had thought when I had heard of his condition, and had sighed in relief.  
It was then that the injured boy had groaned and had started to stir awake.

"Okita-san. Can you hear me? You're at the hospital now."

The eyes had squinted before revealing breathtaking, beautiful crimson eyes which had stared right into mine and had made my heart skip a beat.

"Okita-san. Can you hear me? You're at the hos-"

"Shut up! Once said is enough!"

"..."

His rudeness had shocked me so much that I had become speechless.

_...how indignant!_

The boy had seemed really frustrated with something.  
And from then onwards, he had hid his face with an arm and had stayed silent.

After the operation and a night's worth of rest, I had to go and visit the boy.  
But as I had thought, he still had a very infuriated look, which it had made me hesitant to go near.

But as a nurse, I should do my work without an excuse!  
That's what I had said to myself and stepped forward.

"How are you feeling?"

I had bravely start a conversation as I check the meter on his medical systems surrounding his bed, but not receiving a reply, I had switched my gaze towards the patient.

"How are you feeling?"

He didn't reply the second time either.  
In fact, he hadn't even looked towards my way and had just glared outside the window, which had nearly made me sigh.

_Well, I guess there are these kinds of patients too..._

I had almost given up on this patient, and was about to move to the next patient, when I thought I had seen those crimson eyes flicker towards my way for a second.

_Huh?_

I had stared at the patient again, but I saw no difference with his face expression or the direction he was staring, so I nearly think that it had been just my imagination, but he gave me proof that I hadn't been seeing things.

"...The nurse from last night?"

"Eh? Oh, um... yes," I had replied.

To that, he had then slowly faced my way and before I had realised it, his previous scary face expression had been wiped away.

"...my bad."

That's the only thing he had said, before he had turned back to what he had been doing.  
But only those few words had made me feel warm inside, and echo in my mind like bells chiming tranquilly.

After that, he had started talking to me bit by bit.  
Although according to the other nurses, he doesn't give a word to anybody else.  
Well, he doesn't talk to me at all either if I address him as 'Okita-san'.  
He says that since he's younger, it's weird for me to be calling his name with a '-san'.

_Well... he does have a point..._

But consequently, I am the only one special to him.  
But how I am special to him is that I'm just a really good toy to be picked on and teased at with his pranks!

_Because he has pulled a prank at me from the first ever actual conversation we've had!_

"...Miss Nurse. I think this miso soup is a bit too spicy for me..."

"Eh? I wonder why... That shouldn't be so..."

"Please try it out yourself."

And before I had been able to refuse him, he had put the miso soup bowl right against my lips, so I take just one sip from the bowl.

"~~~~~~~~~!"

I make out an eerie voice as my eyes water.

The soup was...

...EXTREMELY SPICY!

Indeed it was spicy... but this taste...

_It's definitely mustard! And not only that, it was a WHOLE HEAP in there!_

Something that shouldn't ever be in there.  
And I don't even have to ponder who had put it in there.  
Beside me, is the culprit who is laughing his head off with his crimson eyes gleaming with sadistic joy.

Such situations keep coming on and on by the never-ending sadistic thoughts by the infamous extreme sadist, Okita Sougo.

There's even a rumour that he is the most sadistic torturer of the Shinsengumi police.  
With no doubt his glare and infuriated face is so fearsome that it makes the back of your spine chill...  
Such a beautiful face structure, yet a bloodcurdling expression.

Like a tiger.

But I now come to realise that that's only a mere mask to hide his weak side.  
The Okita-kun who sets mischievously pull pranks, and then laughs evilly but cutely in victory when his pranks are a success, is like a cub without fangs.  
And it makes me feel, that this side of Okita-kun is who he truly is.

Even on the first day that we met, he had probably been mad at himself for being in such a pitiful state and was such a failure for a person like him to be here.  
He was drowning so deeply in those emotions, that he accidentally put his anger out on me.  
But he understood that he was at wrong and had apologised to me properly.

And before I knew it, I just wanted to see that side of him so much, that I know he's up to something but I just throw my self forward to those pranks and go visit him frequently.

Okita-kun isn't the fearsome guy that everybody says he is.  
He's just slightly clumsy at making friends.  
Just slightly putting on his guard too strongly and can't loosen it well.

His inner self, is just a gentle and caring person... is what I think he is.

So then time flies quickly and two weeks after Okita-kun's operation, he is ready to leave the hospital already.

"Please be more careful from now on. Don't overdo yourself and put yourself in danger! Please make this the last visit to the hospital, okay?"  
I smile warmly and send Okita-kun off.

"Okay. Then, I'll see you again when I'm severely injured again."  
He warmly smiles back in reply.

"Are you listening to what people are saying!? I JUST SAID to NOT OVERDO yourself and to BE CAREFUL! Please, don't put yourself in danger anymore!"  
I growl at Okita-kun who had purposely teased me and glare at him who bends over from laughter.

_...is it THAT funny!?_

"Sorry, I can't promise that, Ricchan. That's the kind of thing I do for a job."

He laughs and replies like that as if he is being sarcastic.

_It's not something to be laughing at, you idiot!_

I then suddenly remember the first time I saw Okita-kun.  
The bloody appearance and the gruesome wounds...  
And then the expression he was wearing when he was drowning with hate directed at himself...

"...I don't want to see... that suffering expression of yours anymore, Okita-kun."

Ah... I probably made a face I shouldn't have.  
As a nurse, I was supposed to send off patients with a warm smile...  
Yet I probably failed at that and I'm probably looking as though I'm about to cry.  
Because Okita-kun looks a bit troubled.

"Well, I guess I can be a bit more careful... just for your sake, Ricchan?"

Okita-kun says that, and then puts his big, gentle hand upon my head.  
I memorise the feel of his hand that gently pats my head before he turns round and raise a hand while he sets off, without looking back.

"Thanks for taking care of me."

* * *

Cye: It took soooooo loooong to update! Urgh! So many stuff going on and motivation and etc etc.  
This oneshot was longer than I expected... so I'm going to break it into two parts.  
So yes, THIS IS NOT THE END! There will be a part 2!

And this isn't as angst-y and depressing as my usual.  
I attempted to make it funny even! TRIED! XP  
And _tried_ to make it a bit romantic.

Thanks for reading and faving and reviewing!  
Love to all the supporters out there for me!


	2. ONESHOT Part 02

**Cye: First submittion this year. Hello to those who are new, and to those who know me from part 01 of this story or any others.  
****Thank you so much for reading and supporting as always, and I hope we get along well this year too!  
This one is a long one, but hope I won't bore you till the very end.  
Enjoy~**

* * *

**Lovesickness, part 02**  
(slightly long oneshot)

* * *

I thought that those who fall in love with nurses were only those that had impudent erotic thoughts such as Kondou-san  
And even if not, I thought such a lame thing as to fall in love with a nurse, wouldn't ever happen to me... such as Yamazaki...  
Such as Yamazaki...

_So why am I here lamely holding a bouquet of flowers and walking towards the damn hospital!?_

I feel so sick of myself...

And the next thing on the list that I am sick of:

As I enter the hospital and reach the reception, I am showered with questions by all the nurses that I made sure to ignore last time I saw them...but they just won't give up, will they?

"Oh, it's Okita-san!"

"Okita-san! Are you here to get hospitalized again?"

"Oh, what's that bouquet of flowers?"

"Is that to the nurses for last time?"

"Or are you here to visit someone?"

_I have no business with any of you! Scram!_  
I say in my mind, but just ignore them as usual, until the head nurse disperses the screeching nurses for me.

I feel gratitude towards the head nurse and wonder if she was the only nurse who can tell that I have no intention to talk to anyone.  
The others are at the same level as Hijikata-san who can't read the atmosphere at all.

"The room number is 3055."

The only thing the head nurse says to me.

_What a truly an understanding person she is..._

"...cheers," I mutter before setting my feet in the direction of the said room number.  
My heart betrays me as it beats so out of control that it would be disastrous if it was to be heard through the speakers.

3052… 3053… 3054…

3055…

―…hn, here it is.

The doorknob makes its sound as it turns.

"I'm coming in," I say and make my presence clear before stepping in.

* * *

"_Eh...E-eeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhh !? C-captain!? Why on earth!?_"

"Fuck up!"

"Yes! No! Eh-but why!? What? It might snow heavily today! Accompanied by a typhoon and tornado and hurricane!? Maybe even with a world record natural disast-!"

"Is it _so bad_ for me to just fuckin come and see you? Why the fuck is merely just visiting you is such a miracle happening for you! Okay. Fine. You want me to turn this room into a murderous bloody party where I slash and shred you into tiny pieces of flesh? If that's seems more "normal" for me to you. What do you think, _ae_, Yamazaki you bastard," I retort with a murderous smirk, making the rather okay-conditioned 'minton-morron* go as pale as a dead person.

"N-no! It's fine! Thank you very much for visiting me and I appreciate it from the bottom of my heart!" He rushes to thank in panic before I get to put my words into action.

And then when I thrust him the bouquet of flowers, Yamazaki's brows fly way over hairline and eyes widen to maximum extent, almost bulging out.

"Eeeeehhh!? W-what on earth is this!?"

"Did you hit your head that badly? These are called _'flowers'_," I explain to him with sarcasm dripping off my words.

"Ah, no... I do get it... it's just... is it personally from you, Captain Okita...?"

"_You think_?" I say slowly, mocking Yamazaki's intelligence, "it's from Kondou-san, you thick-head."

"Oh, oh~! I see! Of course it is!" Yamazaki sighs with such a huge over-relieved expression plastered across his face and figure that I hadn't needed to be worried for him for even a second.  
And that fact makes me tick in annoyance.

"Asides that, why the fuck are you hospitalized so soon after I went through the trouble of saving your fucking ass, you moronic asshole! Maybe you actually wanted to die, _huh_!? Then I'll just kill you here right now! Sounds like a good plan, _ae_? I growl.

"O-ow! Owowowowowowowowowowow! Ouch! C-captain! T-the flowers! The flowers will go bad!" Yamazaki screams while covering his head for protection as I repeatedly bash the bouquet of flowers I have in hand to relieve my irritation towards this moron.  
But then my action freezes to a stop when I hear a certain voice.

"Stop it right now! The flowers are definitely not for hitting people with it!"

If I slowly turn my head towards the door, there _she_ stands.  
The reason of my visit to this hospital...

"...Okita-kun?"  
As soon as our eyes meet, she calls my name in recognition, and I feel my heart leap.

"Ricc- "He~ did you know Ricchan!?"

When I try to call her name, the bastard Yamazaki beats me to it.  
And moreover...

_Did he just fuckin call her 'Ricchan'!?_

Trying to suppress and control the over-boiling anger that writhes lividly within me takes so much energy that it makes me unable to say anything to her in return.

"Long time no see," she greets and smiles warmly towards me, but I can't force my lips to separate.  
She gives up with a slight frown and takes the flowers out of my hands to arrange them into a vase.

"How are you feeling, Yamazaki-san?" Ricchan starts a conversation with the moron Yamazaki with such a warm, gentle voice.

"O-oh, yes. Very fine thanks to you, Ricchan!"

_Why the fuck are you calling her 'Ricchan' so casually!?_

After that, I come to visit Yamazaki regularly for an excuse to come see Ricchan.  
But every time I do, Yamazaki and Ricchan chat so happily together.  
Seeing them like this becomes too over-bearing to watch and one day, I just can't control the fury that's boiling within me anymore and leave the room without a word.

It makes me feel boiling rage to see the two chatting so happily.  
I hate seeing that happy look on that fucker Yamazaki when he's talking with her.  
But more than that, I feel so sick of myself for becoming this frustrated from such a trivial matter that it makes me want to throw up in disgust.

_Why the fuck do I have to feel so frustrated from this stupid-as reason!?_  
I stomp my way down the hospital corridor and I start to hear Ricchan's voice and footsteps that chase after me, but I completely ignore it.

"I told you to _wait!_" she cries when she finally reaches me and rounds upon me, stopping my steps.  
It would be such an easy thing for me to slap her arms that cling on to me right now and keep ignoring her, if it isn't for _Ricchan_._Because_it's her, I can't force myself to do it.

But even if it's _her_, I can't force myself to change my attitude any time soon.

"What do you want?" I demand, and I see her wince.

"U-um...w-why are you so angry?" she asks with hesitation because I had forced her to be like this.

"I'm not angry."

_No, no matter how you look at it, I'm totally 100% angry! What the hell am I saying!?_ I retort back at myself for the said words in my head, but my facial expression doesn't change the slightest which makes Ricchan frown sadly.  
I didn't intend to make her look this way...

"U-um... we hadn't seen each other in awhile, but Okita-kun hasn't talked to me at all... s-so... I was thinking... w-would you happen to be able to make some time for me to chat... with just the two of us? I-I've got a break in 10 minutes! So..."

"Is there even something there to talk about it? Now that I'm not a patient, you, Miss nurse, and I have absolutely no business with each other at all, don't you think?"

_What the fuck am I saying!?_I scowl inwardly.

And with no doubt, Ricchan looks heavily hurt.

_Hurry up and apologize you moron!_I shout at myself inwardly, but my mouth is in denial...

"Um...well, a-anyway, in ten minutes time, I'll be waiting at the hospital's waiting room!"

_Is this what they call say-n-runaway?*_I think forming a sweatdrop as I see her dashing back into Yamazaki's room as if running into a bombshelter as if her life's depending on it.

"What... am I supposed to do?" I sigh.

_Where or who am I supposed to vent this building up irritable emotion on?_

* * *

I don't know how it had come to this, but ever since I had become in charge of Okita-kun, I have been in charge of all the Shinsengumi soldiers, and this time, I had been assigned to Yamazaki-san.

I wonder how long it has been since I had been assigned to Okita-kun.  
Not once I had I seen him after that.

Every day, the hope of seeing Okita-kun gradually becomes stronger that each time a Shinsengumi soldier comes into the hospital, I can't help feeling hopeful that it might be Okita-kun.

Although if Okita-kun isn't visiting the hospital, it means he's somewhat keeping my promise and not be careless with his work.

So, no news means good news... I guess.

But still, I can't stop wanting to see him again, which makes me a failure as a nurse...

_I wonder if things had turned out differently if I wasn't a nurse and had met Okita-kun in a different situation..._

I can't help myself but let out a deep sigh.

_No no! I got to get a grip on myself!_ I inwardly chant to myself when I get to the door of Yamazaki-san's room and reset my feelings before moving towards opening the door.  
And when I open it, I see a person bashing Yamazaki-san with a bouquet of flowers.

"Stop that immediately! Flowers are not meant to be for beating up people!" I demand, and the action freezes on spot.  
The antagonist then turns his head around and my heart in turn, freezes.

_...why?_

"...Okita-kun?"

Yes, it had been him, the one I had wanted to see and here he is, without a single change from when I had last seen him.

-But the happiness only lasts for that spur moment.

Okita-kun is really cold towards me, and hardly talks to me anymore.  
After reuniting with Okita-kun, he comes to visit Yamazaki often, but he will never talk to me once. But I still can't stop feeling hopeful to see Okita-kun whenever I go over to Yamazaki-san's room.

Then one day, as if I had done something to worsen Okita-kun's mood, he storms out of the room with a furious scowl plastered across his face.

I apologise and excuse myself from Yamazaki-san before leaving the room to go after Okita-kun.  
I call out for him and stop him in his steps.  
He looks highly irritated and I think for a moment there that he hates me now but even with this mood, I still get a reply from him which makes me somehow confident that it's not too late yet to talk to him.  
So I tell him a time and place to meet and...run away.

Holding my chest that feels as if it's about to burst, I return to Yamazaki-san's room and with no doubt, Yamazaki-san stares at me perplexed.  
But deciding not to be bothered by his perplexity, I ask him a question I had been bursting to ask the moment I got back.

"Um... Okita-kun normally won't ever talk to someone who he has no interest in, right?"

"Eh? Ah, yes... Now that you mention it..." Yamazaki-san replies in shock at the further abruptness in my actions.

"Ah, I was right..."I sigh, somewhat relieved.

And as if Yamazaki-san noticed something, he smiles at me encouragingly.  
But then for whatever reason, he starts become pale and then panics about.  
Although my heart and mind are too occupied to be able to even notice or care how Yamazaki-san is at this state.  
When 9 minutes is up, I'm in a verge of nervous breakdown.

_Would he even come to meet me...?_

None the less, I'm the one who asked him to meet me, so I have to go no matter what!

"U-um... I'll come back later to check up on you," I barely manage to say without getting the words stuck down my tightening throat.

"See you later," Yamazaki-san replies with a warm smile.

_I wonder if Yamazaki-san can see through me..._  
He waves me off with a knowing smile as if he's saying he understands and also saying "Go for it!"

_Yes, I shall go and fight!_

Forcefully making my heavy feet take me to the waiting lounge, I see his presence sitting upon one of the sofas, making my worry turn to dust.

But the somewhat nervousness stays with me when I find Okita-kun's facial expression still showing ultimate annoyance.

_I wonder if I can talk properly with him..._

"S-sorry for making you wait, Okita-kun."

My heart drops when he won't turn this way to acknowledge me.  
But I know that he heard me the first time.  
I won't say it twice, remembering Okita-kun's words from when we first met.

"Well... then, since it's a sunny day today, let's go to the roof top, shall we?" I suggest, resetting my emotions.  
To this, Okita-kun finally glances my way with slight look of surprise even with the negative facial expression plastered across his face.

I have hardly any confidence with myself but when I turn back at the elevators I see Okita-kun following me promptly and I mentally sigh in relief, stepping into the elevator along with him silently all the way to the top.

When we reach the rooftop, the awkward atmosphere created between the two of us won't fade away.

_That's right. Okita-kun said he has nothing to talk about...  
Which means I have to start talking to him, or else he won't talk to me..._

"Um... long time no see," I awkwardly start off.

"..." No reply from Okita-kun.

_Oh, that's right. This is the second time I said this..._

"T-the weather seems so fine today, there's not much clouds are there?"

"..."

_You don't give a damn!?_

"Okita-kun, how is going with your work recently?"

"..."

_Please! I beg you! Talk to me! Anything! *cries*_

Okita-kun just sits there mute, on a bench, staring at just one point on the ground.

My hopes hadn't died when he had followed me all the way here, but now I feel no trace of hope left as I come to realise that to Okita-kun, I am no longer related to him in any way and he has no business with me any longer so there's not even a point in talking with me...

Just as I start to become overwhelmed by this wave of depression, Okita-kun starts talking to me.

* * *

Ricchan tries really hard to start off a topic and attempts to hold a conversation but I ignore all of her words.  
I couldn't make myself talk and come up with anything reasonable to reply with my boiling, murky mixed feelings like this.

Soon Ricchan is out of words and lets out a small sigh, and her face gradually becomes depressed by the second.

If I open my mouth now, I'll only hurt Ricchan's feelings. I feel that only nasty words will come out of it.  
So that's why I had put a zip to my mouth, keeping it all in to save myself from saying anything hurtful.  
But everything has limits to itself, and bursting intention of wanting to speak, is no exception.

"You..." I mumble a start.

"Y-yes!" Ricchan immediately replies in shock.

"Have you fallen for Yamazaki?"

_What a fuckin straight forward question! What the hell are you saying!? It's so obvious that you're just over pouring with jealousy!_I mentally scream at myself.

"Eh? Ah, no! D-definitely not! Um... I don't feel anything... like that... for Yamazaki-san!" she flusters in panic.

_The panicked reaction... so suspicious..._

The sadistic fire burns more furiously inside me that comes from the word called 'jealousy'.

"Too bad for you, but if a soldier and woman such as a nurse have a relationship, that's a seppuku*."

_There are no such rules, moron! What are you, a kid? For picking on the chick you like!_I further insult myself mentally.

I know this is downright appalling and that I'm just not willing to accept the fact that I lost the game.  
But I just want to hear her say it from her own mouth, that she's in love with Yamazaki, or else I can't entirely give up on her.  
So even if I become the villain, I'm going to go through to the end with this.

_This is the end between us anyway. Whatever, let's just make her hate me to no end._

"I-I do have someone I like! B-but it's...it's not Yamazaki-san!" she starts cracking.

"Then who on Earth is it?" I press.

"U-um... that person...well..um...that is..." she stutters.

_So it IS Yamazaki. You're trying to bluff it off?_

"...umm p-please don't be in any concern over this. I-it's only a one-sided love... I-I promise it won't trouble any of the soldiers of the Shinsengumi..."

"Even if you say so, there are rumours going about already so I really need you to verify the facts here," I keep lying through my teeth.

A week has already passed since Yamazaki's been hospitalized, so it wouldn't be weird if a rumour like that spreads right about now.

"...Eh? D-does that mean that...the person will... get kicked out of Shinsengumi..." she hesitatingly asks in fear.

"Well of course. But if you won't talk, we'll have to have all the suspicious people seppuku one by one then, won't we?" I threaten slyly.

_Starting straight out from that bastard Yamazaki!_

"So, what's it gonna be?" I pressurize her, and now she is almost in a brink of tears.

"Really...i-it's only... it's only just my one-sided feelings... the person doesn't know how I feel! So... so please..."

Her voice starts to crack and I feel this massive guilt, but I can't control my largely spread sadistic flame inside me any longer.

"Too bad, but that's how the rule goes within the Shinsengumi forces. Those who break the rules are committed to seppuku."

"No way..."

"Feel like revealing who this person is now then?"

"..."

"Okay, Yamazaki is officially committed to seppuku," I finalise and turn my back on her as I start walking towards the door that leads me back inside.

"P-please wait!"

_This is too forcing. Why don't I have any control of my mouth when it's attached and belongs to me?_ I growl inwardly when I hear her desperate, frantic voice stopping me in my steps.  
I turn around to see Ricchan crouching down, trying to hide her bright red face.

I crouch before her and ask the question.

"Who is the one you like?"

"...ta...un"

"I can't hear you if you cover up your mouth," I say as I not unkindly wrench her arm that hides her face, away from her.  
She deepens her blush and her eyes are swimming under tears.  
It's such a cute expression that it makes my heart waver for her greatly.  
And then...

"_T-the one I like... is O-Okita-kun...!_"

"Wha-...?"

My eyes widen and I let the wrist I had been grasping onto, slip.  
This isn't what I had been anticipating.  
I feel my own face becoming hotter by the second.  
Luckily, Ricchan is too busy looking down to see my face.

"...but you so frequently go visit Yamazaki..." I try to reason her suspicious acts.

"T-that was because... Okita-kun frequently comes to visit Yamazaki-san... so... I thought if I go there... I have a greater chance of...seeing...y-you..." she stutters.

And here I never would have dreamed that she had been visiting Yamazaki with the same reason as me...

"...U-um."

I come to my senses when she suddenly directs her words to me, undoing my shock-frozen body.

"A-are you...going to get... kicked out of the Shinsengumi...?" she cautiously asks, fear evident in her voice.  
It's just so cute that it makes my sadistic side ignite to life again.

"Well, yes. I guess this comes down to seppuku as well," I say, faking a troubled look.

"W-wwwwwhat should I do in order to set you free from doing a seppuku, Okita-kun!?" she panics almost in hysterics.

"If you give a word of pledge to be by my side forever, then I can make you my woman. If we officially start dating on a base of marriage, then the seppuku gets cancelled out," I explain.

"B-but...I-... there still are a lot of patients that needs me... and so I can't really...quit my job...quite yet..." she mumbles, lowering her head once again.

A grin forms on my lips as I change the rules as I please.

"Then I'll let it go with just a kiss."

"_...eh!?_"

* * *

_Eeeeehh!?_

I'm in so much panic that my head is spinning and I don't even know if I'm even making sense in my replies to Okita-kun when suddenly I hear the word "Kiss" pierce strongly into my ears.

_Eh? What on earth are you saying!?_

I then hear Okita-kun start chuckling and it dawns on me that he's just playing with me.

"P-please don't mock me!" I growl...

...and then get a reply that I hadn't been expecting.

"Oh? I was actually being quite serious, ya know."

Before I know it, Okita-kun's facial expression has gotten gentler.

"B-but... such foolish reason... cancelling a seppuku just by a kiss...it's just-" I blurt out in confusion.

"Well I _can_ make that happen. If it's _me_that is, since I'm the first division captain of the Shinsengumi leading those no-good soldiers for the record," he casually explains.

"_Eeehh!?_"

_Okita-kun just casually mentioned a very seriously important fact that I wasn't aware of!_

Why hadn't I known it till now?  
It had been the first time I'd heard of it.

_No wonder everybody was too scared to talk to Okita-kun and left me to be in charge!_I think inwardly, finally finding the connection between two loose ends.

"You thought that you've fallen for a guy with a terribly high digit just now, didn't you?" Okita-kun guesses as he chuckles at me again.

"No, I mean- well..." I stutter, lost for words.

"Well asides the fact that I truly am the first division captain, the stuff about the seppuku or getting kicked out was all a lie," he suddenly confesses.

"Eehh!? T-then why...?" I ask in shock, not being able to even finish my sentence.

"To be truthful... just some random reason to be able to kiss you...?"

I feel at loss for words.  
I can't circulate my brain to understand.  
But my body grasps the meaning to Okita-kun's words faster than my brain and I feel my face burn hot.  
The next few words that Okita-kun whisper to me with his sweet voice, doesn't help me with the state I'm in at all but instead, nearly squeezes my heart out.

"To be honest, it seems that... I've fallen for you too."

_N-No way... Okita-kun as well...?_

Though looking back at Okita-kun's recent actions, all just seems to reason out perfectly like as if missing puzzle pieces have come together to create a one whole picture.

Why he had been coming to visit Yamazaki-san so frequently even if he doesn't do anything while he's there...  
Why he had been looking so bothered...  
Why he averts his gaze to the other side of the room when Yamazaki-san and I have a chat...

The moment I realise this, I become more and more embarrassed by the second and look down, suddenly not being able to look straight into Okita-kun's eye anymore.  
But my chin gets lifted gently by Okita-kun's fingertips.

"Can I... kiss you?" he whispers softly.

"...y-yes."  
A one-sided love becomes mutual, and my heart isn't able to handle this fact. It suddenly feels too big for my chest and I find it hard to breathe already.  
The additional pressure makes my head spin when Okita-kun's sweet, soft lips melt against mine, making me suffer.

Like I thought, he really is a super sadist...

By the next day, the word about Okita-kun and I officially dating, runs like the wind and is known by everybody.

* * *

**~Epilogue~**  
(extra)

"Oh yeah, so why are you letting people call you Ricchan?" I ask, which I had been bothered by for the past few weeks.

"Eh? W-well... because... it was the first ever nickname given to me...and I was so happy... so..." she mutters, flustered.

"...I was supposed to be the only one to call you that..." I mutter, slightly annoyed.

"What was that?"

"Nothing... From now on, I'll call you Ritsu. Only I'm allowed you to call by that, so don't let anyone else call you that. Got it?" I demand.

Ritsu stares at me for a second with a blank look before forming a pink blush upon her cheeks with a really satisfying, happy smile.

"Got it!"

Her expression when she replies is just too cute that my heart is about to explode. I stretch my hand towards her face and take away her vision.

"Don't look so damn happy," I growl.

"Eh?" she says confused and succeeds in taking my hand away that had been there in attempt to hide my blushing red face that I hadn't want her to see.

"That's so cute!" She chuckles at me, "I didn't know you can look like that, Okita-kun!"

"Shut up. Don't say stuff like I'm 'cute'," I growl but I only get more laughter in return.

Dammit!

"But," I start, my facial expression easing once again, "Ritsu is really a nurse, aren't you?"

"Eh?"

"'Cause you definitely cured my sickness."

"Okita-kun, you had a sickness?"

"That's right."

"Ehh!? W-what kind of sickness?"

"That..."

...that I won't tell even at the brink of death! *menacing at self*

So Okita shouts inwardly at himself while only within his mind, he confesses the truth.

It's the one people call... 'lovesickness'.


End file.
